Friday, June 08, 2007

the character of dogs.

dogs, like humans, were originally bred for work.

therein lies the relationship.

we work for food and they provide companionship.

and they chase the postman.

the other dogs in the niegbourhood.

small children.

airborne newspapers.

cats.

squirrels.

bicycles.

motorcycles.

in fact anything that strikes them at the time.

did i mention barking?

they like to bark for no reason that humans can find.

there must be some metaphysical pleasure that they derive from barking thier heads off at nothing in particular.

and have you ever noticed that some people look like thier dogs?

and dogs are loyal of course.

they are pack animals and see us as the alpha or pack dominant animal.......unless they don`t of course, in which case they will shit on your bed or tear the ass out of your coat while it`s hanging in the closet or any other way they know to let you know that, well, you aren`t it.

oh, and one other thing; don`t, whatever you do, try to make yourself look tough by getting a pitbull, feeding it steroids, putting a spiked collar on it and walking comically like it does.

people will laugh.

6 comments:

Fleming said...

Every time I look away from my computer monitor and see various neighbors being pulled along the street by their respective dogs, I feel profoundly sorry for me. . . especially if it's drizzling.

One of the many advantages of cats is, "No walkies."

dr.alistair said...

there was a time when i was one of those fortunate few who were dragged along in the rain and i missed my canine companion when his time concluded.......but i won`t do that again.

my guitars are company enough.

BBC said...

I suppose that you didn't read my post about a dog I lost on my birthday as it was before you discovered my blog.

But I don't have a dog now, I have nothing living that I can't take care properly in my busy life.

So all I have is a few Aloe Vera plants and my cats.

dr.alistair said...

yeah bill, losing a loyal companion is hard. my alsatian dog rocky was my friend for 12 years before he got sick.

i owed him the honour and dignity of a quiet and painless end.

it was one of the most difficult things i`ve ever done.

watch theose aloe vera plants though. they are fuckers.

BBC said...

My Aloe Vera plants are fuckers?

Boy, would I like to catch them at that and take a picture.

dr.alistair said...

i meant fuckers in the sense that they are self-satisfied moralists.

i don`t think a photo would capture the nuances of that.........

i prefer ficus trees. witty, intuitive and patient. though sarcastic when tired.