i saw her again yesterday.
and yes, my heart lept. but i dropped myself down into a relaxed state and unattached to the thought of her and my heart rate dropped and i went back to my conversation........and i saw something new.
i saw a nervous uncertain girl who couldn`t look over without fiddling with her glasses and her hair as she stood in the line getting her coffee.
i didn`t miss that nervous girl.
this is the nervous girl who ran from a perfect thing. i never saw the nerves.
i felt it. but i ignored it because everything else felt so good.
so now i`m asked to recieve something from this beautiful new one, and i have to find my center to recieve.
otherwise i`m no better than the first one and the new one will get hurt.
life is too perfect and beautiful for that to happen on my shift again.