Thursday, May 11, 2006

looking for love?

people go looking for love. our literature and movies are full of depictions of the process. we are convinced by the language of our society that this is a valid process with a clear and attainable goal.
so off we go out the door looking for love.
so why is it that this thing is so hard to find?
because love is a mechanism that is in the reciever.
that`s you.
it`s not out there at all.
that`s why people search endlessly, in the bars, the parties and the beaches and resorts of the world. looking hungrily out at people who are doing the same thing..........on a wild goose chase.
the love we are all looking for is deep inside our souls. it is to be recognised and nutured and encouraged. this is the thing we have been searching for all our lives. it is the thing that makes us human. when we find love in ourselves then the entire universe becomes loving and nurturing and a simple place to function.
the next step is to look for others who are feeling the same thing too.
this love is a protector of the spirit. it won`t allow attacks and torments and deceptions. it cuts losses and severs ties if it has to.
there is no room for anything but love.
there doesn`t need to be.
there is so much love in the world that to not recognise it in yourself means that you aren`t alive.
robots are like that. doing things. not feeling.
when we go looking for love outside ourselves we are acting like robots, responding to the romantic notion of the media`s idea of relationships.
and where has that got us all?
we cannot afford to expect someone else to love do our loving to us, when we don`t.
does that make sense?
that`s like trying to breathe life into a doll.
if you want to be loved then get to loving yourself.
the idea of sullenly demanding to be loved is comical. it is the way a five-year-old perceives things.
pure ego.
if i hold my breath long enough then i`ll get what i want.
there is a better way.
crank it up.
try it and see how the world changes along with you.


anu said...

Such a powerful post Dr. I'll want to read this a 1000 times to get it in my let it sink in my bones and my let this drown in every drop of my blood and every strand of my hair.

I just want to get this into me. I know it, now that you've been reiterating it so much. But honestly, i choose to fool myself and seek instant gratification and approval and attention. Becoz its a lot of work to love yourself. It so easy to cling and crave for another to do the job for you.

But i'm realising that there is no way out..other than this. Thank you Dr. It is so easy to get swayed and carried away. Your space helps me get focussed and centered.

At the end of every single day, despite what i write here and everywhere else and say, i still end up looking for love. And i need to get out of this syndrome.

dr.alistair said...

we live in a society of conditions. i will do this if you will do this. it`s all about keeping score. and if the game gets too lop-sided then one person wants to call in all the conditions. we have to become lawyers just to hold the door open for someone.
too hell with it. i will project my love, my way. people can accept or reject. no contracts.
this is a warrior`s way. it is for keeps. you have this chance to love yourself in a meaningful way because you have spent the time to understand what it means to you. keep it up.