Wednesday, March 29, 2006

pattern interrupt.

so you have a thought........it`s a terrible thought. one you have had before and when you did it made you feel terrible for hours. now you are having it again. it is a feeling like no other. it overwhelms you and controls you and the feeling then becomes you. you become that feeling.
in the past the feeling persisted and had it`s way with you, but do you remember the moment it went away?
the moment it went away was the precise moment that another thought took it`s place and began to have it`s way with you.....and so on.
a pattern interrupt is preciely that..........an interruption of the pattern of feeling that you are having that you recognise as your conscious mood. this works exactly the same way for a good feeling as for a bad one. you are having a nice daydream about something pleasant and suddenly, bang! you nearly run over a cyclist in your car..............you can`t quite get back to that same pleasant mood now though. this works with the shit feelings too.
it just takes a bit of practice.
realise you are having a memory that triggers a bad mood, or realise that you are in one. now as you recognise the feelings in yourself and track back to the essense of where it all started and touch on the main points, hit them with a hammer........in your mind, or literally get a hammer out and bang on a piece of wood or a nail and drive the negative thoughts down flat and yell "shut the fuck up" to yourself until it seems amusing..............
when you begin to smile or laugh is when the pattern is successfully interrupted and a new neurochemical pathway is established in your body...........you have made a new drug to trip on.
when you realise that you are in control of the drug factory and you can make any drug you want to do any task you want, then the only question is, what next?

3 comments:

Dr.Alistair said...

the funny is what you make of what i am saying.......there are those who would be offended. there are those who would be confused. there are those who would say how does he know that thing...........you just accept your own joy and laugh. you ask how that i know that you are on a a path of enlightenment.....you are laughing.
my job is easy.

Dr.Alistair said...

we are constantly provided with the opportunity to learn and move on to the next thing in our life. the dream was an opportunity to let the feelings go. the letters too. delete. so with that action go the feelings. the dreams will stop. it`s all up to you when you choose to have a better life.
i am going to speculate that he may have been unable to cope with your illness. that`s not a judgement of his character so much as an observation of your anxiety in the dream and that it`s a natural way for some peopple to feel about illness.

Richard said...

I used pattern interrupt to survive the post traumatic stress-like symptoms of unfaithfulness. It took a good while, but it did take.